Discover my Cosy Crimes & Historical Sagas

Discover my Cosy Crimes & Historical Sagas

Sunday, August 31, 2008

What would Boris do?

News that Ray Nagin, Mayor of New Orleans has told city residents to "get their butts out" as Hurricane Gustav hits, made me wonder what the London mayor would say and do under the same circumstances. I think it'd go something like this.

Right, chaps, bit of a problem. With the weather, I think. Yes, that's right, rain, wind, whoosh, big storms, floods. Cripes. Hurricane Ken I'm calling it, what? Right then. Gosh. Hands out of pockets, stop playing trouser ping-pong, put on serious face time. So um, yes, run for the hills, we're all going to die from a big storm. A very big storm. What would Granny Butter do? Cripes. Yes, chaps, make for the airports. Or better still, take the bus. The big, red, shiny Routemaster bus. I love 'em, don't you? Bring 'em back, that's what I say. I did say, didn't I? Crumbs. Anyhoo, head for the bus or those other things, those long things, the ones that pull out of stations, lots of steam, Choo Choo! So that's it, chaps. Wrap up warm and um, look after yourself. I'm off to Tuscany. Ciao.

Monday, August 25, 2008

Coronation Street Weekly Updates

I've been writing Coronation Street weekly updates since 1995 and this week's Coronation Street update has just gone live here.

This week the update comes with Emily Bishop's bedroom secrets.

Birthday Spurtle

Best birthday present received last weekend was a spurtle. I've wanted one for ages. I might name it Shona Spurtle aka Hitler in Tights. And if that means nothing to you then you haven't had the theme tune from The High Life stuck in your head for the last 20 years. It was wonderful, was The High Life.

Haven't a clue what I'm on about? Then have a look here.

Friday, August 22, 2008

Bump, Grind and Ding-Dong

Did you know there are CDs of Londoners' favourite sounds? Well, there are. Anyway, here are two of mine.

The bump, grind and hollow clang in the tube station on a morning as I wait for the train. The noise can ever only mean one thing and it fills my heart with joy. An empty train is coming out of the siding and I will get my favourite seat.

The 12 noon ding-dong from St Clements in the Dane church. It really does ring out Oranges and Lemons.

Optical allusions

Weeks of blurred vision while reading and using the computer lead me, oh so very reluctantly, to accept I need an eye test. But I haven't booked one yet; it's not a vanity thing of how I might look wearing specs...


...it's because to admit I need glasses means to admit to getting old, and I'm not quite ready for that just yet.

Thursday, August 21, 2008

Birthday

This weekend I'll be celebrating another birthday which makes me another year older but still none the wiser. This year I will be celebrating hitting the end of my early-40s but I'm not officially mid-40s yet, oh no.

Monday, August 18, 2008

Coronation Street Weekly Update

I've been writing Coronation Street weekly updates since 1995 and this week's Coronation Street update has just gone live here.

This week the update comes with a moustache-clad Kevin Webster.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Me and Madonna

She might have a few years on me and bigger upper arm muscles, but Madonna and I share something in common. Actually, we share two things in common but one's too personal to blog so you'll just have to guess. What I can share is that Madonna's favourite beer is Timothy Taylor's Landlord. And so is mine.

Stotty cake

Just back from a weekend up north for fresh air and stotty. I saw a documentary on The Little Waster, comedian Bobby Thompson. My favourite joke of his goes like this:

"There waz a knock at the door last Wednesday mornin'. She says, 'This is Anne from Littlewoods', I says, 'God bless ya! I've won the trebble chance?' She says, "No, your wife's up for shoplifting."

Blog birthday

Crikey, this blog is now two years old. Here's my very first post from August 18, 2006.

Monday, August 11, 2008

Coronation Street Weekly Update

I've been writing Coronation Street weekly updates since 1995 and this week's Coronation Street update has just gone live here.

This week the update comes with a simpering Gail Platt.

Theatrical treats

To the theatre three times in a week which puts me in danger of becoming a luvvie.

First to the Royal Festival Hall for The Wizard of Oz. Despite some awful reviews and a half empty house, I thoroughly enjoyed it and recommend it wholeheartedly.

And then up to my favourite seaside town for a weekend by the sea, taking in two Alan Ayckbourne plays at the Stephen Joseph Theatre. I've blogged these two here, they were both brill.

Monday, August 04, 2008

Saturday, August 02, 2008

New car

Today we bought a new car.

Tomorrow we'll go out for a spin.
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